Perspective

I haven't blogged in a long time.  I guess I just haven't felt like I had much to say.  Sometimes, it just seems best to be quiet and listen for awhile, and that's what I've been trying to do more of lately... especially since Dad passed away.   I've been trying to listen to God's voice for guidance and perspective.

I was pretty exhausted after the funeral.  Since Dad took his last fall on Christmas Eve, our lives had been pretty centered around taking care of him.  After he passed, there was a huge void in my schedule, my life, my heart.  But it was hard to really slow down and grieve because there was much business to take care of.  Packing up and moving all his belongings.... going through his things, deciding what to throw away, what to GIVE away, and what to keep... all of that was physically AND emotionally exhausting.  Closing out all his bank accounts, credit cards, etc...ended up being mounds of paperwork, which took a lot of time.  I still haven't gotten to all my thank you notes yet.... (SORRY, they are COMING!) and I still have a garage full of things and papers to go through.  I have heard it takes a year to finish all the work it takes to close out a parents estate when the last one passes.  I believe it.

I was lucky to have an understanding employer, who let me sub out a few gigs and take some time before jumping right back on the road.  My first trip back out with CC was to Japan.  Some thought I was crazy to go, but I truly LOVE Japan and I had a feeling it would be a healing trip for me.  Little did I know what God had planned for my time in Japan.  MY plans were to be out exploring the Japanese cities I was visiting, but all that changed when I came down with a fever and bad respiratory virus.  No exploring for Moi.  I was stuck in my hotel room everyday, taking meds and staying on vocal rest so that I could get through the show each night.  But just like it always works when God's plans are different than mine, it turned out to be a wonderful thing.  I had a lot of solitude/quiet time which allowed me to cry a lot over losing Dad, pray a lot for God's guidance, and read a lot of inspiring books and blogs that I had been wanting to read but kept putting on the backburner.   It truly was healing in more ways than one.

I saw this quote the other day:

Man... that is SO TRUE.  Too often I dig my heals in and refuse to change my perspective on something that I am convinced I am right about.  But lately, I've been seeing a lot about "God's perspective" and I've been asking Him to help me see things through His eyes, not mine.  From His perspective, not mine.   It's not always easy, because I struggle with what I want to be truth.. what I have believed for so long.... and sometimes, when you have to admit that maybe you've been seeing things from your perspective, or a human-perspective that has been ingrained inside you by well-meaning but flawed people, or by cultural allegiances that you haven't ever questioned, it's very hard to let go of old beliefs and move into Jesus territory.

 I think the whole "WWJD" fad thing is old news in our society now (I mean, do they even SELL those bracelets anymore?), but I'm trying very hard these days to keep that in mind when approaching people, situations, and in conversations.   Even though Christianity as a religion is declining in numbers in the USA, people still seem to have relatively good feelings when questioned about JESUS... they just don't have good feelings about CHRISTIANS.  Hmmmmm....... that can only mean one thing....

..... and that is......????  

Anyone?   Anyone?   ..... Bueller?    :-)

Talk among yourselves.   I'll be back.....

Love y'all....... M