"Embracing Your Second Calling" - Chapter 2

 Chapter 2 --- Getting Personal

“We feel shaken.  We feel scared.  We do not feel safe.  The center’s not holding and things are falling apart….. We inspire far less lust than we do respect.  We’re not quite prepared to settle for only respect.” – Judith Viorst, Necessary Losses

Ouch.  Really??  Are we REALLY here??  No more lust aimed our way??? Oh boy.   Let’s just say it.  The physical manifestations of aging suck.  They seriously suck.  The wrinkles, the gray hair, the aches & pains, reduced energy.....and those hot flashes. --Oh GEE…Why did God make us this way?  Hmmmmm…… Why DID God make us this way??   I mean, He had a choice.  He could’ve made us creatures that didn’t show “age” past a certain point, right?   Like my dog Django, who showed up at our door one day in the middle of a rainstorm.  Everyone says, “He’s SO cute!!  How old is he?” – I don’t know how old he is, he was a stray. He could be 2, he could be 8, he could be 12.  Can’t really tell by looking at him.  Wow!  Why didn’t God make US like that!?!?!  

Well, my friends, I’m here to tell you that God had his reasons for making us go through this aging process and you can fight it all you want, but it’s still gonna happen.  No cream or lotion, plastic surgery, medication, exercise or herbal product is going to bring us some fountain of youth.  So how do we deal with it all?

This chapter talks a lot about Naomi.  It reminds us how she had a “perfect” life with her wonderful husband, 2 adoring sons, and 2 beautiful daughter-in-laws, and then the bottom dropped out.  She pretty much lost everything.  Her husband dies.  Her two sons are killed.  She finds herself living in a foreign land with nothing to cling to.  She was too old to find another husband or use her good looks for influence.  God had waited until she was middle-aged, no longer valued for her sex appeal or childbearing capacity, to radically change her life.  So NOW what's she gonna do, huh?  --"This story begins with all the markings of a tragedy.  But through divine providence and Naomi’s obedience, the book of Ruth ends just four chapters later with Naomi not only feeling fulfilled but playing a pivotal role in the fulfillment of prophecy.  She goes from being in the pits to becoming one of the most important women in the Bible.  And she does it in ways that every woman can understand and emulate." -pg 18

“Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force.” – Dorothy L. Sayers

We’ve got to STOP spending so much time and energy on fighting the aging process and start embracing what it all means.  Like I said before… God made us this way.  He created us to AGE.  Yet we fight against it.  Over and over.  And I think we are missing the whole point.

    “I believe that God wants to redeem all of the broken heels, chipped nails, dead-end jobs, broken marriages, less-than-perfect children, bad perms, fad diets, lost friendships, and PMS of the first halves of our lives.  He needed us to get those things out of the way.  He wants us to trust in something so much bigger than the best diet, the most wonderful sale, the biggest house on the block, the finest china, the top title, or the perfect husband.  He wants us to know that just as he can take a woman who feels bitter and empty to being full to overflowing, so, too, can he transform even our best lives into something so much more.”- pg 28

So go ahead... yell at God. Tell him how pissed you are because your feet don't look cute in your new strappy sandles because of those ugly varicose veins that have showed up.  Tell him how mad you are that none of the cool clothes in the "junior" dept are made to hide your backfat.  Let him know that you are NOT happy about having to watch every morsel that you put in your mouth because it seems you now gain weight over night if you indulge in more than lettuce.  Go ahead.  He can take it.  That's what Naomi did.  She let Him have a good piece of her mind... and then she let Him guide her into the part of her life where she could really make a difference. 

 My guess is God knew this whole "aging thing" was gonna tick us off.  He knew it would fire us up and make us re-evaluate things. Start focusing more on what's really important in this world.  "If all the Christian women aged forty and older got truly serious about seeking God and letting him use us in amazing ways, we could completely change our world."  I BELIEVE IT!!  --Would YOU wanna fight a herd of ticked-off 40 yr old women?? ... yeah, I didn't think so.  Powerful! 

“As long as you’re breathing, it’s never too late to do some good.” – Maya Angelou

My first Valentines....

February 14, 1962

They must have been SO excited!  The call they had been waiting for had finally come just the day before.  "We have a baby for you." said the sweet lady from the Oklahoma Dept of Human Services.  "Can you pick her up tomorrow?"  Her.  They had a daughter!  After many years of trying to conceive and then several more years of being on the adoption waiting list, it was finally happening.  Two would become three -- and their dream of being parents was now becoming a reality.

But... they weren't prepared.  Most people have 9 months to prepare for parenthood.  They had been waiting so long that they had almost given up.  They didn't have anything at home for this baby.  No diapers, clothes, bed, food.... they had alot to do.  They made some calls to friends to begin praying for them as they entered this journey of parenthood.  They hardly slept that night...

It was Valentine's Day.  How perfect was that???  They drove down to the offices of the Dept of Human Services and walked through the door.  They were directed down into a room where a lady was sitting holding a baby girl.  "Are you ready to meet your daughter?"  she smiled at them.  She gently handed me over to Mom and Dad.  "She's all yours.... enjoy her!"   Mom said I was wearing a pink dress with little white shoes.  They had dressed me up for my big presentation to my parents!  They drove me home and when they arrived, found friends waiting for them with a surprise baby shower.  Food, diapers, formula, clothes... everything they needed!  How sweet is THAT? 

And so began my life as Marcia Ann Ramirez.  Daughter to Betty and Manuel Ramirez.  Blessed beyond words to have such loving and devoted parents.  They were my first "Valentines", and so today is extra special to me because this is the day I got a family!!  

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!!   Love to you all.....

Flurries....

 

I read this quote this morning from Louie Giglio:

"God used astonishing brilliance making you an original. Don't spend all your energy trying to be the same."

It made me think of snowflakes and how each one is truly unique... I looked outside and there they were... falling from the sky... snowflakes!  They were dancing throughout the air and I grabbed my camera to capture them.  The photo above is what I took.

 Why don't snow flurries show up in photos?   I swear there are TONS of them floating around in this picture, yet not a one allows itself to be photographed.   I guess that's just one of life's mysteries.  Too bad though.... they were pretty.

Now I'm just wrapped up in a blanket in my sunroom, just soaking in the beauty of the day while trying to do a little bible reading.   I love lazy Saturday mornings.   Having a day where nothing is rushing me out the door is rare for me, so I never take it for granted.  I'm gonna put something in the crockpot for dinner and then chill out with a good book.....   

How about you?  What's your favorite thing to do on a chilly, snowy Saturday in February?  

12 years ago tonight....

February 7th, 2000....

It's still vivid in my memory.  It was 5:50pm.  I went into the kitchen and pulled out a skillet to start making some spaghetti for dinner.  "What are you doing?", my husband, Mike said in disbelief.  "You're not really about to start cooking dinner are you??  Isn't she supposed to call at 6:00?".  "Yes," I said, "but I can't just sit here waiting for the phone to ring.  What if she doesn't call?  I need to stay busy."

At exactly 6:00 the phone did ring.  Mike and I looked at each other with nervous excitement.  I glanced at the caller-id.  All it said was "Oklahoma City, OK".  I took a deep breath and answered the call.  The spaghetti would have to wait.

"Hello?"
"Hi, ummm, is this Marcia?  I mean, is that how you pronounce your name, like Marsha?"
"Yes, that's right.  This is Marcia.  Is this...???"

... my voice trailed off because I didn't know what to call her.  "Yes, honey. It's me.  This is your birth mother."  I took a deep breath.  I could hardly even believe I was having this conversation.  After 38 years, I was finally hearing the voice of the woman who gave birth to me, and believe it or not, it actually sounded familiar.  I knew instantly that it was her.

 I was blessed with amazing parents who adopted me when I was 2 months old, but throughout the years I had often wondered about my birth mother and why she gave me up.   I wondered where she was, if she ever married, did she have any other children...?  Oh wow, that would mean I had brothers and sisters!  (Growing up as an only child, that was especially intriguing to me.)  And what about my birth father?  Did he even know about me?  Where was he?  Did they love each other?   SO many questions.  --- And she knew it.

"I bet you have alot of questions for me, don't you?" she said.  "I sure do," I said.  "First off, what's your name?" "Valorie, my name is Valorie".  Wow.  I know her name.  After all these years, I'm getting answers.  It was surreal to me.  "Where was I born?" I asked.  "You don't know that?????", she said incredulously.  "No, I don't know anything", I said.  "Oh child, we DO have alot to talk about, don't we?"

We stayed on the phone for almost 3 hours.  Both of us filling in details of our lives over the last 38 years.  At one point during the conversation she said, "Hold on a minute, your brother wants to talk to you."  I almost dropped the phone.  A brother!  I have a brother!  "Hey sis!" my brother Darryn said. "It's about time you showed up!"  I started to cry.  This was unreal.  I had brothers and sisters now.  I had nieces and nephews.  I had a step-father.  I had brother-in-laws and sister-in-laws.  And I had answers... lots of answers.  Answers to questions that had lingered around in my head my whole life.

"What about my birth father?  Does he know about me?".  She got quiet for a minute.  "Yes", she said, "he knows, but I don't feel I can give you information about him before talking with him first."  That was fair.  I mean, we had only had one conversation and she didn't know if I was a kook yet or not, so I thought it was sweet that she felt protective of him, even after all these years.  I did eventually get to meet him, but that's another story for another day.


This post is about her.  And about how February 7th, 2000 changed our lives.  And how it was the beginning of a treasured relationship that I now feel blessed to have with ALL of my birth family.

Tonight, the phone rang.  I saw her name on my caller-id.

"Hello?"
"Hi!  Well, I have it down on my calendar that tonight exactly 12 years ago at 6:00 you and I talked for the very first time!"
"Oh WOW!  It IS today, isn't it?" -- I looked at the clock.  It was exactly 6:00pm.  I smiled. "And your call is right on time... again!"
She laughed.  "So what are you doing?"
"Making spaghetti"... I said.   We both laughed.  Some things never change.

Proverbs 3:3

Rosemary Beach, FL

Proverbs 3:3 - "Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your
neck, write them on the tablet of your heart."

Rosemary Beach Girl's Getaway weekend!

 

Fell in LOVE with Rosemary Beach, FL last week!!  I went down there to perform along with Kaci Bolls and Alissa Moreno at the Annual Rosemary Beach Girl's Getaway.  I didn't want to leave!   I have to thank Malayne DeMars for asking me to be a part of the event, and for taking such good care of us while we were there!   It was a much needed retreat from the dreary January weather we've been having... I even got on a BICYCLE for the first time in years!!  Seriously folks... you should all take a little trip to Rosemary Beach.  You'll LO-VE IT!